Most heavy drinkers are quite acrobatic in their movements and there was one night in particular where Rudolph's skills as an acrobat were on full display. I came home from shopping late one Friday night and Rudolph was just winding up his night's activities. I start unloading the bags of groceries from my car and my roommate was watching Rudolph and suddenly she yelled "He is going to fall."
That caught my attention and right as I looked up and sure enough, Rudolph starts the slow motion dance that only people that are very drunk can do. He tried catching his balance but there was no balance to be had. By the time he made it to the top step, it became time to watch the train wreck. Rudolph had on a bright green shirt so he was easy to watch. He fell down the four steps end-over-end and he hit his head really hard twice. As he lay motionless at the bottom of his steps, my roommate, who is a CNA, yells out "Oh my God! We have to go see if he is okay."
My response was "Oh, hell no. I am not going through this shit again. He is not my problem." She implored me to go with her to check on him as "he might be dead." Once again, it was not my problem but out of humanitarian concerns, I stood at the end of my driveway and I yelled out "Are you OK?" several times until he started stirring at the bottom of the steps. My roommate was already halfway through his yard when he started pulling himself up using the railing on his steps. He was very shaky but very much alive. Problem solved.
The next morning Rudolph did not make it out of the house until about lunchtime but he was moving around better than I was. I believe I need to start drinking what he is drinking.
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